I don't know why???

when the time i lose my friendship, I felt sad. no friends beside me... This kind of feeling is really hurt my heart. what can i do get back this friendship.. I lose this friendship because of my temper.. I am a hot temper person.. That i can't control ...  That what the reason no one wants to be my friends..   when Astha told me"we don't want your friendship in fornt of cholthicha.. It really hurt my heart...  I cried many time because of this fiendship break...  why all the bad thing all happened on me??  what the reason that i need this friendship?  I can tell them my problems, when i am boring they can play with me, they also can chit-chat with me..  where are all my friends?? Friends where are you??  Friends can you come back, I really need you beside me...I hope the time can turn back to that time they play with me, chit-chat and tell my problems to them...